I’m slightly addicted to Foursquare. There, I’ve said it.
It’s true. Foursquare has mastered the art of allowing people to gain gratification from their day-to-day adventures. With every check-in, comes a small rush of excitement, a sense of accomplishment, the thrill that maybe the next check-in will lead to a shiny new virtual badge. It all ads up to wanting to check-in over and over again.
But, while I applaud the track that Foursquare is on – including the diverse, and growing roster of badges available – there seems to be a few very important badges still missing that could help up the excitement level. So, to help our friends at Foursquare out, I’ve compiled a top ten list of badges that need to exist, in no particular order:
As Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino from Jersey Shore put it, “You gotta GTL everyday to make sure you’re looking your best bro. If your shirt looks bad it makes the whole product look bad.” How to get the GTL badge? Check into a gym, tanning salon, and laundry mat in that order in one day. Fist pump!
This Is Why You Are Fat Badge:
Craving a KFC Double Down? This one goes out to all of you who have the stomach to take down the triple threat – breakfast, lunch and dinner at your favorite fast food establishment. How to get the TWYF badge? Should be easy… just check into three different fast food locations in one day.
Buzz Aldrin Badge:
While orbiting outer-space seems like fun, it provides little opportunity for gaining prized badges. This one goes out to Oleg Kotov and crew. How to get the Buzz Aldrin Badge? Check in once from outer-space. It may set you back 30 mil, but it’s definitely bad ass.
This badge is for everyone that says wicked pissah, exclusively drinks Dunkin’s coffee, and considers the Red Sox a religious obligation. How to get the Masshole Badge? If you truly fit the description it should be easy. Just check into Fenway 5 times and Dunkin’ Donuts 20 times in one month. Good luck, and don’t forget to drop your r’s.
Screw checking in at the North Pole, any amateur can do that. Try checking into Atlantis, El Dorado, or Shangri-La… now, that requires real skills. How to get the Unicorn Badge? With your Indy-like abilities check into 3 mythical locations, and remember to pack your hat and whip. Kali Maaaaaa!
Glass Slipper Badge:
Do you spend night after night looking for your own personal Cinderella? Are tall glass slippers, long flowing hair, and excellent pole dancing skills on your check list of qualities? If so, this could be an easy badge to procure. How to get the Glass Slipper badge? Check into 5 strip clubs in one month. Don’t forget a thick roll of ones and some hand sanitizer . . .
You’re Cool Badge:
This one goes out to anyone that has a strong desire for skinny jeans, obscure tattoos, ironic mustaches, PBR and fixed gear bikes. How to get the You’re Cool badge? Check into 10 American Apparels, 5 music venues, and 1 tattoo parlor in one month. If you cried when they stopped making the real Sparks you’re on the right path.
Hardly Working Badge:
Ever have the secret burning desire to set your workplace on fire? TPS reports and small cubicles be damned! To get a Hardly Working badge just check into 6 different locations during a workday from the hours of 8am to 5pm. Just don’t get caught by your boss… mmmk!
Nerd Alert Badge:
Do you identify with Star Trek, opting for a life of cold, dark solitude playing WOW on 48 hour benders? Do you not see the point in paying rent when your childhood home has all the creature comforts you will ever need? To get this badge just check into your mom’s basement 30 times in one month.
This badge is pretty straight forward, check into jail. Any jail of your choice. It may help to get your Crunked badge first.